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Blog Archive

About Me

Rabbi Chaim Coffman
Rabbi Coffman has helped people from all across the spectrum to prepare themselves properly for Orthodox Conversion to Judaism. His students admire his vast knowledge and appreciate his warm, personal attention and endearing sense of humor.
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Welcome to Rabbi Chaim Coffman's Blog!

I would like to thank you for visiting my blog, Beyond Orthodox Conversion to Judaism.

The conversion process can be a lengthy and daunting one to say the least and I want you to know that I am here to help you through it.

I have been teaching newcomers to Judaism for over a decade and over the last few years I have seen that conversion candidates really lack the support and knowledge they need to navigate the conversion process and successfully integrate into the Orthodox Jewish community.

I created my mentorship program in order to help make this whole experience as smooth and as painless as possible! (Can't do much about the growing pains, though ;)

Feel free to get to know me a little through the posts on my blog and visit the mentorship and syllabus page if you are interested in possible joining us.

I sincerely wish you all the best in your search for truth and spiritual growth.

Looking forward to meeting you,
Chaim Coffman

My Rebbe, Rav Moshe Sternbuch

In case you were wondering why I have all of these articles written by Rav Moshe Sternbuch, he is my Rebbe, and one of the gedolei hador (greatest Rabbis of our generation).

Rav Sternbuch fully endorses me and supports my mentorship program.

He is the address for all of my halachic or hashkafic (practical and philosophical) questions that I or my students may have.

The articles are based on his weekly talks on the Torah portion that the Rav gives in Jerusalem in his kollel. As a member of the kollel I get first dibbs on the photocopies and I type them up for my blog so you can all benefit from the Rav's erudition and insight.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Conversion to Judaism if the Wife and Kids Don't Want to

Converting to Judaism is about submitting one's self to G-d's will. That means a person has to be dedicated and willing to do whatever the Torah tells us. This means we have to keep mitzvos even when it is difficult, even if we face financial pressure or people make fun us.

In short, it is an all or nothing proposition. That being said, how can one possibly keep the mitzvos if their spouse will not? Not only will it severely hurt the marriage but it will be difficult in educating the children as well. Both spouses must be on the same page for this to work. If one spouse is not willing to go through the conversion, then the other spouse has one of two choices: either stay a Noahide or divorce.

Although the reality seems harsh, it would be extremely difficult for it to work out if both spouses are going in opposite directions. At the same time, if the kids did not want to convert but the spouses did, then that would raise some issues but it would not invalidate the conversion.

There would have to be some guidelines laid out for the kids to live in the house but the parents could convert if their kids decide not to. It just makes the dynamics in the house much more difficult.