Beyond Orthodox Conversion to Judaism

A very common question that comes up when going through an Orthodox conversion is can I still homeschool my child? While many today homeschool, most beis din's will not look to favorably upon this for various reasons. The first reason is that a person converting to Orthodox Judaism needs to integrate into the community as best as possible. Integrating means that the children attend the local Orthodox school or schools in the city in which they live.

This cannot be over emphasized. It is going to be hard enough to fit into the community and this will certainly make one stick out! Another reason that homeschooling is really not an option is because you need someone to be able to teach the child the basics of Judaism and what things mean and why we do them. A parent most likely (unless they themselves are Torah scholars) will not be able to do this. Even to hire Torah scholars to learn with the child is not such a great option because of the integration issue we mentioned previously.

The argument could be made though that there are issues with the schools (whatever they may be) that would prevent a parent from sending their child to that particular school. The only reason that homeschooling may be appropriate is if there is no other place to send them, in that case, the beis din won't convert you anyway until you get to a stronger community.

No school is perfect and there may be a number of issues that we in the Orthodox community have to work on specifically in the realm of education, nonetheless, this is the system that we have and we must make the most of it.

As a convert to Orthodox Judaism and learning about Judaism yourselves, you must make the effort and get the children into a school, run by Orthodox Jews that perpetuate Orthodox Jewish values. If someone is on the outside looking in, keeping the children in a situation where they won't thrive is a mistake.

The next of the 48 ways of acquiring Torah is to minimize speech. The Mishna does not say do not speak, it says to minimize speech. This means that when we speak, make it meaningful. Don't waste your time on things that don't matter or speak derogatory things about others especially when we are learning.

We have seen previously in Pirke Avos that if one is walking on the way learning and stops learning  and says what a nice tree or nice furrow (or something else he says wasting time from learning) it is as if he is obligated with death. (Pirke Avos Chapter 3 Mishna 7). According to some commentaries this means even if he praises G-d's creation, it is as if he has forfeited his life.

We could look at this and say this is different because it shows the importance of Torah learning and wasting time while learning. We could also see this as a general idea of not speaking when I don't need to all the more so when I am learning Torah!

The Chofetz Chaim wrote a book called Shemiras HaLashon, guarding our speech. He didn't say it is forbidden to speak, but how we are allowed to speak. The Torah praises action more than speech, as we say, talk is cheap, let's see some action!

Another message from this character trait is that there is nothing better than being quiet. Better not to answer when something is said if you will not be able to control what you have to say. Even if you do have to say something, the idea is to minimize it as much as possible.

The reason is that the more one speaks, the more careful one must be since there are so many halachos about proper speech, one may make a mistake and say something they are not allowed to say. The problem is that the media promulgates the idea of saying whatever you want, when you want...Here the message is very different.

Yom Hashoah, Holocaust Memorial Day, is commemorated remembering the 6 million that died with a moment of silence. Once that siren goes off, everything stops. People in cars get out and stand up, people stop what they are doing for these two minutes to remember the 6 million. Is this a Jewish custom?

The answer is no. Silent prayer and worship, including moments of silence practiced during other group activities have been practiced by Quakers for more than 300 years. In the Colonial period Pennsylvania Quakers and Lenape Native Americans worshiped silently together on several occasions.

Moments of silence have often been observed prior to football games with reasons for silences range from national and international tragedies, to the death of people connected to the sport or specific clubs. As we can see, not a very Jewish custom to say the least.

So what would be a better way to remember the 6 million? Many rabbinical authorities hold that the day for that would be the day that we remember all national tragedies, the 9th of Av (T'sha B'Av). Even if that is the case, what should we do during those two minutes that the sirens are going off?

One way would be to say Tehillim (Psalms) or to learn some Torah thought. If we just stand there...we don't really do anything for the 6 million. By saying Psalms or learning in their merit, we help their souls and help ourselves to commemorate their memory properly.

There is a time and place to remember them, and it should be done in a more Jewish way!

• The struggle of life is the struggle to be awake.
• Decide that life is good. Otherwise you'll go to sleep.
• Get the maximum out of your body. But don't torture it either!
• Don't miss out on life's opportunities and pleasures by oversleeping.
• When we're excited about a project, our creative juices and mental faculties are in full gear.
• Watch out for "zombie-ism." Don't walk around devoid of thoughts in your head.
• Too much sleep dulls the mind.
• Tiredness is a habit. Break it.
• Unless we take practical steps to stay awake, sleep is going to overcome us.
• Whenever you learn something new, wake up to the recognition that you were partially asleep before.
• If you learn how to live with joy, sleep vanishes.
• In the "final sleep

The next of the 48 ways to Acquire Torah is the knowledge of Scripture and Mishna. The commentaries tell us that one should be an expert in Scripture and Mishna since they are the foundations of Torah. The Mishna is what the foundation of the Talmud is which makes up what we learn and why we do the fundamental things in Judaism.

The Jewish people have survived this long exile because they have have kept to the laws of the Torah and have learned it. Unfortunately, we have seen the other side which is lack of knowledge of the Torah. This has resulted in assimilation and intermarriage.

The more the Jews know about their heritage, the more they are likely to perpetuate their priceless heritage to future generations. If we don't, then that lack of knowledge leads us to assimilation and intermarriage.

There is an example of this a number of a years ago an Arab terrorist was in jail and he saw his Jewish jailer eating pita during Passover. The arab terrorist said to the jailer, "Doesn't it say in your Torah, that you are not allowed to eat any leavened product during the holiday of Passover." The jailer responded, "that was thousands of years ago, it doesn't apply today, we today living in the land of Israel are the new Jewish people. We don't have to keep those old laws."

The arab terrorist replied that a people that has no connection to its history, will eventually relinquish the land that they hold right now. This gave him more of an impetus to keep up the intifada since eventually the Israeli's will give up the land because they don't have such a connection to it.

As we continue to count Sefira and make our way towards Shavuos, we shouldn't forget the importance of learning Torah but we should live it as well!

The next of the 48 ways to acquire Torah is deliberation. This means that when one is asked a question, one should think deeply about it and analyze it from all directions so one doesn't answer too quickly and give an answer that is not correct. Not only that, if one does not learn with consternation and  deepness to try and understand the subject at hand, one will not have full clarity in what they are learning.

Many times a person may think when they are asked a question, they are obligated to give an answer straightaway to show how much we know and understand about the world. This just shows our hubris to think we may know more than we actually do.

Here the Mishna tells us to wait, think about it and then answer. That shows our patience and our ability to reason and give a thought out researched answer. This does not make the person weak because he doesn't answer right away, it shows that they want to have a complete answer that is properly investigated.

The next of the 48 ways to acquire Torah is through learning from your students. The Gemara tells us that we learn the most from our students since they are ones that will challenge us the most by what we teach them. The reason is because when a teacher gives a class, the purpose is to make sure the students understand what is being taught. The teacher will learn as well from the questions his students ask and will make him sharper and more prepared.

Another reason that the questions the students ask increases the knowledge of the teacher is because the questions can lead to other things that flush out the material at hand. This leads to an extrapolation which can shed light to other subjects as well.

This idea is not limited to just learning Torah but to any other subject as well. If the student asks good questions, it will make the teacher work harder and more will be learned. Students need to grasp the material but it is through their questions and insights on the material that helps it be better understood.